A love letter to the wishes you haven’t said out loud.
People loooovvvee to tell me I have my life together.
I have a corporate job – head of marketing at an executive recruiting firm. I own a home… drive a nice car (subjective). From the outside, it probably looks like I’m doing everything right. Maybe even “living the dream.”
Here’s the thing: I feel so far from it.
Some days, I wake up and feel like I’m walking through a life I didn’t choose. Like I’m stuck in a loop – same drive, same building, same forced smile. There’s nothing wrong, per se. There’s just nothing lighting me up either.
And I’ve realized… that version of me people admire? The myth of the girl who “has it all together”? She’s a fraud. A highlight reel. A really good actress (give me my Oscar).
But deep down, I feel unfulfilled. I feel like I’m meant for something else… something more. Not more money or a better job title. More life. More purpose. More of me in everything I do.
I have dreams.
Big ones. Like pack-a-bag-and-travel-the-world kind of dreams. Like “screw it, let’s make music” dreams – even though I have zero experience, no idea where to start, and a voice in my head that constantly whispers, you’re already behind.
But those dreams haven’t gone away. If anything, they’re louder.
I’ve spent so long pouring my energy into fulfilling other people’s visions. Working hard, showing up, being dependable. And that’s fine. But lately I keep asking myself… when do I get to chase what I want? When will I start putting in the work for me?
I don’t know exactly what “having it together” means. Is it a job? A house? A perfectly curated routine? If that’s the case, maybe I’ve checked the boxes… But if it’s about joy? Freedom? Feeling like you’re actually living your life instead of surviving it?
Then no. I don’t have it together. Not yet, at least.
But maybe that’s the point.
Maybe the myth of the girl who has it all figured out is just that – a myth. And maybe the real power is in being honest about where you’re at, even if it’s messy. Even if you’re still figuring it out. Even if the only thing you know for sure is that this… can’t. be. it.
So, if you’re like me, feeling a little lost, a little stuck, but still holding onto a spark of something more – I hope you know you’re not alone.
We weren’t meant to shrink into routines that don’t make us feel alive.
We weren’t meant to be background characters in someone else’s story.
And we sure as hell weren’t meant to spend our one wild, precious life waiting for “the right time” to begin living it.
Let’s stop pretending we have it all together.
This life isn’t about having it all figured out. It’s about having the courage to live on your own terms.
Need something lighter? Browse the blog archives for more vibes — there’s a little bit of everything here.